It's happening isn't it?
I'm slowly - but quite surely, beginning to abandon my blog.
I've had my needs met -
Used her for all she's worth....
I grasped for her in the beginning - begging for space and a voice and 5 moments every other day that would allow my other voice to sing out - the one that doesn't have dishwater hands or stoop to scrub the glue-like substance of weatbix from the floor -
the space that encouraged me to express my love for motherhood and the bits that challenged me -
a space that reminded me that I see things in feeling -
and feel in colour -
a space to record thoughts and moments, not let them float up - away.
Now there is a reversal -
and expressing ideas are a weekly requirement. Now they flow out in rapid succession to be analysed and evaluated, challenged and questioned. Now expression is being assessed.
It's filling me up and spinning me with stimulation.
I have no time for her anymore, this blog of mine - though I love her still.
I wonder if she'll continue to bother with me.
follow your gut and heart.
ReplyDeleteperhaps a different blog? perhaps time away.....
onwards and upwards!
I hear you!!! And I possibly might be following you. Change is all around me and I don't know if it's this change that leaves my blog at the bottom of the list, or if it's just time to move on, maybe take a break...There is no doubt blogging has born me many gifts, but something's gotta shift.... wishing you peace and clarity in your choices!!!
ReplyDeletexo
Do what feels rights. Blogging should be an enjoyable experience, not a chore. Whatever you decide, I hope you find an immeasurable amount of peace. :)
ReplyDeleteAgreed--do what feels right. That's always the right answer, even if it will leave your readers a bit sad :)
ReplyDeleteyou'll definitely need to follow your heart on this one. i had a blog previous to the current one...wrote it for over four years and it just began feeling like it wasn't my space anymore. i no longer felt at home there. i made the decision to shut it down and didn't blog for about two years but the itching to write grabbed hold so i started this one. it's been a gift but it's also a bit of work - definitely understand where you're coming from.
ReplyDeleteit's healthy with blogperiods as such... I have only recently found you and I will miss you...
ReplyDeletebut one has to do, what one has to ; )
goodmorning,
ReplyDeletei just wrote a long comment here, just to find my internet connection broke down...
and what did i write?
well, something about that we sometimes just grow out of them, the blogs, just like other things in life. i agree with demie, we gotta do what we gotta do, right? and i hope i will still bump into you, somewhere here?
love and embrace
you're stronger now, i can see you smiling beautifully M. Take care always.xx
ReplyDeleteIt's good that you recognize your needs, even if that means leaving her behind.
ReplyDeletePerhaps, you will be back one day...
Aww :( I really enjoy your blog, but I understand. Follow your heart!
ReplyDeleteDon't abandon her! Just get back when you have the time to! There will be people waiting for it :)
ReplyDeleteOr you could return.....I wish for that
ReplyDeleteBuon inizio settimana...ciao
ReplyDeleteblogging is an evolution of self. let her and you evolve, no requirements)))
ReplyDeletexo
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